Short Review: The real gift is if this movie came with a complimentary barf bag.


Billy Bob Thornton can’t write.

Let’s be clear, neither can I. I don’t know if you’ve ever noticed my atrocious grammar. I understand I am chucking big ol’ cinder blocks at William’s glass house, but I must.

Billy Bob Thornton can’t write.

This film is a drifting, condescending bore. Even with a very talented cast (Cate Blanchett, Greg Kinnear, Giovanni Ribisi, JK Simmons, Gary Cole and Hilary Swank) and one of the best working directors, Sam Raimi, this film is like eating paste dipped in rotten flour. It’s bland and yet leaves an awful taste in your mouth.

Billy Bob is a very talented actor, but I refuse to give him credit for his script work. I need only this film and Sling Blade to buttress my complaint. This guy’s work is first of all BORING. Not just slow, but produces a soul-pounding boredom - listening to Ben Stein reading the collected works of James Joyce boring. Moreover, he hates southerners. Sure, Billy Bob’s name is Billy Bob, but this guy’s writing pokes the South in the eye at every turn. To view his work, you’d think no one below the Mason-Dixon line has any real value. Can we have yet another presentation of a dim eyed, drunken, slacked jawed yokel beating his wife? These guys exist sure, but can we have the other side of the coin every once in a while?

Are there positive sides to this film? No, not really. It’s not a complete loss, but there’s nothing here to recommend either. It’s a bland, lifeless movie waiting for its turn in the bargain bin at your video store. Which is where it belongs.


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Labels: Billy Bob Thornton, Cate Blanchett, film, Gary Cole, Giovanni Ribisi, Greg Kinnear, Hilary Swank, JK Simmons, Katie Holmes, Keanu Reeves, Michael Jeter, movie review, Sam Raimi

Seth Rogen has cut out a niche for himself. As he did with Knocked Up, he portrays a stumbling loser who is completely amoral and emotionally stagnant. He’s a lovable loser however because he knows he’s a lost cause and is able to find humor in his pathetic existence. Actually, his character in this film, Dale Denton, is almost exactly like his character Ben Stone from Knocked Up with the only exception is that he’s just a little more pathetic this time around. Dale is a bumbling part time process server, fulltime pothead. He has a lousy job, wastes his time smoking dope and hangs out with his girlfriend who is still in high school, he’s much older. After buying a new brand of pot that has hit town called Pineapple Express from his wheezing pot dealer Saul (James Franco) Dale witnesses local drug kingpin Ted (Gary Cole) murder a competitor. Dale and Saul spend the rest of the film being chased by Ted’s thugs. Essentially, this production attempts to combine a pot comedy like Up in Smoke or Half-Baked with the simple structured comedic action-adventure film like Hot Fuzz or The Blues Brothers. The combination is possible to pull off, but in this case it fails.

The film fails because it’s just not very funny. It is amusing in spots, but the script and performances lack any life. For most of the film there’s sarcastic interaction in place of wit, buttressed by sophomoric physical humor. Screenwriters Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg (Superbad) avoid mining any humor from their scenes and stick to offering awkward juxtapositions instead. Everyone in the film is a softy, concerned about being friendly and not having their feelings hurt. Drug dealers are openly worried whether people like them or not. Hired killers complain they’re not spending enough time with their family. Characters capable of ruthlessly shooting people are easy to get misty eyed over insensitive remarks. These character contrasts are played over and over until they become wearisome. The entire cast literally acts like eleven year old boys deciding they’re going to be friends. While this may be amusing at first, it quickly loses its edge and it becomes clear Rogen and Goldberg don’t have any other tricks up their sleeve.

The final act of the film is a complete mess thanks to a lack of consistency. The final act revolves around a prolonged gunfight. This battle is rather violent. Is it way over the top, ala Tarantino? No, there isn’t too much here most audiences haven’t seen before. The issue with the final fight sequence is that it is starkly different from the previous portions of the film. There was violence in the first acts but the overall tone of the movie was still lighthearted and the violence was displayed within that frame. The final act removes the humor and tries to portray itself as a full out action movie. Director David Gordon Green mishandles this transformation and ends up delivering a nonsensical flurry of guns and death. Given the half-man losers he has as his heroes, this transformation is also lacking any logic. You can't say the hero is a pothead dolt who is sent into a panic because he’s scared of being a dark woods alone and then have him magically discover the internal fortitude to single-handily attack a gang of drug runners. It doesn’t work.

To sum up, if you are lacking any standards and pretty much thoughtlessly consume whatever comes down the pipe, you’ll probably enjoy yourself with this film. If you’re a little more discerning, say by wanting actual jokes or at least something clever, you’re out of luck. This is a very predictable and unoriginal film. Yes, there’s not that many pothead action films out there, but you’ve seen these characters and situations under different name a hundred times before.



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Labels: comedy, Danny McBride, drugs, film, Gary Cole, James Franco, movie review, Seth Rogen

Yes, this is crude, stupid and a complete waste of time. That said, it is funny. I know there's plenty of people out there who would disagree. As my Geddy Lee Lovin' Brother-in-Law says "Will Ferrell is a one-trick pony, but its one heckuva trick."

Labels: film, Gary Cole, John C Reilly, movie trailer, Sacha Baron Cohen, Will Ferrell

Screenwriter: David Pliler
Director: Ryan Little (Saints and Soldiers)
Actors: Gary Cole (Office Space), Sean Faris (Never Back Down), Neal McDonough (Minority Report), Sean Astin (Lord of the Rings: Return of the King), Penn Badgley (John Tucker Must Die), and Arielle Kebbel (The Grudge 2)

Labels: film, Gary Cole, movie trailer, Neal McDonough, Sean Astin, sports

As a rule, be wary any film that has the main characters flying through the air in a car screaming at the top of their lungs.

The fact that the trailer doesn't show anything funny is another hint that his may not be the top of line.

Two potheads get caught up in a drug killing and are hunted down by zany hit men. While on the run, said potheads learn about themselves and life and everything gets tied up into a nice little bow in the end.

Who knows, maybe all the red flags are for nothing and this will be a great comedic gem.

Yeah, I kinda doubt it too.




Screenwriters: Seth Rogen (Drillbit Taylor), and Evan Goldberg (Superbad)
Director: David Gordon Green (Undertow)
Actors: Seth Rogen (Knocked Up), James Franco (Flyboys), and Gary Cole (Office Space)

Labels: film, Gary Cole, James Franco, movie trailer, Seth Rogen