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January 22, 2010
Movie Trailer: Nine
Daniel Day-Lewis is the best actor of his generation. I don't think he's made anything I wouldn't consider seeing. However, I'm not sure I'm with him on this one.

Then again, I think that musicals should be renamed "Satan's Flatus". What can I say? I'm an extremist on this one.

It's a nice looking film and the trailer performs its role well enough.

Still has that sulfur smell though.







Screenwriters: Michael Tolkin (The Rapture) and Anthony Minghella (Cold Mountain)
Director: Rob Marshall (Chicago)
Actors: Daniel Day-Lewis (There Will Be Blood), Marion Cotillard (Public Enemies), Penélope Cruz (Vanilla Sky), Nicole Kidman (The Golden Compass), Judi Dench (Quantum of Solace), Kate Hudson (Almost Famous), Sophia Loren (A Breath of Scandal) and Stacy Ferguson (Planet Terror)




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posted by Michelle Obama's Left Nut at 6:00 PM



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January 5, 2010
Movie Trailer: Sex in the City 2
I have the same reaction when I see uber-chick flicks like this.

I love seeing them because I know my Geddy Lee loving brother-in-law will dragged to see it with his wife.

I find that funny.




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Screenwriters: Michael Patrick King
Director: Michael Patrick King (Sex in the City)
Actors: Sarah Jessica Parker (L.A. Story), Kim Cattrall (Porky's), Kristin Davis (Deck the Halls), Cynthia Nixon (Warm Springs), Chris Noth (Mr. 3,000), Miley Cyrus (Bolt), Penélope Cruz (Nine) and Liza Minnelli (Arthur)




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posted by Michelle Obama's Left Nut at 5:00 PM



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June 16, 2008
Sahara (2005)
Should I see it?
Absolutely not.


Short Review: They’ve started showing this film crashing planes so the passengers can look forward to the impact.




This film is based on Clive Cussler’s, one step above a pop-up-book, Dirk Pitt series. That connection to a book is the only literate element found in this film. I will be plain. This film is bad. It is horrid. It stinks to holy high-heaven and is a scourge against all sentient life on Earth.

Phew, it is foul.

This horrible flick is proof positive of nepotism and it makes me dry heave. It is good ol’ boy network crap like this that is killing the art form. This abomination is directed by Brett Eisner – Michael Eisner’s son. Yeah, that Michael Eisner - the Walt Disney Michael Eisner. Does anyone seriously believe Brett Eisner would be working if Michael wasn’t his pop? This is why I hate Hollywood. It is products like this that makes me consider wanting the good people of Earth to invade that den of morons and burn the industry to the ground. There are literally thousands of talented directors who would kill for a chance to prove themselves, and this son of privilege gets moved to the front of the line. It would be one thing if Brett were a talented man. They dropped millions to show he doesn’t know what he’s doing. Was all of this done to curry favor with his powerful daddy? Maybe he made this movie to get back at his father. I know I’d be ashamed if my kin belched out this putrid effort to the public.

I know that nepotism exists in all industries and the more powerful and wealthy the industry, the worse it becomes. It pains me to see it in the arts. The arts, even goofy arts like film, should try to remain committed to excellence…or at least try to give the appearance of it. Brett Eisner directing film - next thing you’ll tell me is that we’ll be asked to worship gangly hotel heiresses as sex goddesses…oh wait.

This production is cultural sludge and you should avoid it at all costs. It may look intriguing, but it will only make you dumber. You have been warned.


Related Reviews:
Penelope Cruz movies
Vanilla Sky (2001)
Gothika (2004)


Other Critic's Reviews:
FilmThreat
Ain't it Cool News


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posted by Michelle Obama's Left Nut at 9:00 AM



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May 9, 2008
Vanilla Sky (2001)
Should I see it?
No - please no.



Its always painful to watch a movie that isn't nearly as clever as its creators think it is. Cameron Crowe is generally creates likable if not whimsical movies (Almost Famous, Jerry Maquire, Say Anything, Singles)...generally. This movie about a completely unlikable publisher who falls for a Spanish chick and therefore jilting a blond chick (played by Penelope Cruz and Cameron Diaz respectfully - apparently the guy is attracted to skinny girls who aren't nearly as pretty as the media wants us to believe they are) and then gets involved in a car crash which in turn sends him into this meandering surreal (read nonsensical) tour of his own psyche. Cruise tries way too hard propping up a detestable character and making his trails interesting. Cruz is typically abysmal - apparently she believes batting her big eyes is a way of developing a character arc. Cruz with her chirping voice and stilted emoting, is more a piece of furniture than an active player on screen. She's like an abstract piece of art that squeaks words when disturbed.

This a true cinematic disaster. Cruise struggles through every scene with a desperate performance that easily stands as his worst on screen effort. The script by Alejandro Amenabar and Mateo Gil (for their original version of the film Abre Los Ojos) is disjointed and contains a disappointing resolution. The disappointment at the end is probably the biggest emotion that the viewer will be allowed by this vapid work.

As a rule, films with surreal elements tend to be haughty and self-interested affairs. This movie fits this mold and has the additional curse of not having a point. The whole affair is reminiscent of Cruise's semi-public, private relationships - tons of emotional straining, strange statements and actions delivered through disturbingly contrived dramatics all leading to a resolution that is messy and deeply embarrassing for everyone involved.


Related Reviews:
Tom Cruise movies
The Last Samurai (2003)
Collateral (2004)


Other Critic's Reviews:
The Washington Post
PopMatters


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posted by Michelle Obama's Left Nut at 10:15 AM



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