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February 9, 2008
Shoot ’Em Up (2007)
Should I see it?
Not even on a dare.



Even you love stupid movies, this film will still probably be too stupid for you to stomach. This uninspired and inept mess makes Uwe Boll movies seem thought out and crafty. It is like cinematic version of binge drinking, it's the ultimate in self indulgence, waste and miserable to witness.

Ladies, as a piece of advice, if you're dating a guy and you see this boxed turd in his DVD collection, you know you've got yourself a loser. Leave him behind, he'll probably not amount to much - he obviously is lacking in taste and self respect. That's right, it's so bad you can actually judge other's characters by their proximity to this product.

Clive Owen (Children of Men), as mumbling and linty as ever, portrays himself portraying some guy named Smith who acts just like very other character Clive Owen has even portrayed. Every once in a while Owen share space with Paul Giamatti (Lady in the Water) who chews up the scenery like some bored and angry pit bull. Giamatti is way too good for the script and ends up overacting to compensate for the moronic dialog that spews from his screaming maw. The two, along with Monica Bellucci (Passion of the Christ) seem to enjoy themselves slumming in this over-the-top sophomoric flick about a guy who tries to save a baby - or something like that, the plot increasingly gets less and less relevant and fades into the background.

This is simply a bad movie. It wants to be brutish, and it succeeds at its goal but that is the only this it offers - being abrupt. If you're going to waste your life watching bad movies, there are far superior bad movies to watch than this.


Related Reviews:
Clive Owen movies
Inside Man (2006)
Elizabeth: The Golden Age (2007)


Other Critic's Reviews:
Movie Freak
Roger Ebert


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posted by Michelle Obama's Left Nut at 9:49 AM




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